Hank’s Ranks (Week of 11/1)

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Henry Teghtmeyer

In this new installment of Hank’s Ranks, I will be ranking Mario Kart games. The Mario Kart series is one of the most popular video game series in the world and has touched the lives of many. Its groundbreaking gameplay and nostalgic factors cement this series as a classic.

For this list, I will only rank the games I have played. So if there is a game that is missing, you know why. 

Additional note: this list may upset you. 

Let’s begin.

 

  1. Mario Kart Tour

Seriously, what is this game? Nintendo has been trying to expand the mobile gaming market with titles such as Mario Run, but this game is truly forgettable. Filled with in-app purchases in order to unlock various characters, it gives off the impression of just another pay-to-win mobile game. This game was popular for a second, then faded into obscurity, where it belongs. Pure disappointment. 

 

  1. Super Mario Kart

This game started it all. This game is a classic, but its lack of features and course simplicity makes it difficult to spend more than 30 minutes playing. I don’t have much to say about this game, mainly because I hardly played it. 

 

  1. Mario Kart-Super Circuit

This game is essentially Super Mario Kart but with improved graphics and new modes. Otherwise, it is a forgettable title, especially with others in the series. Nothing more really has to be said about it. 

 

  1. Mario Kart 64

This game for its time was truly revolutionary. The first 3-D Mario Kart game did not disappoint with its solid course lineup along with multiplayer modes. I don’t have much to say about this title, other than its groundbreaking graphics for its time and nostalgic factor. 

 

  1. Mario Kart DS

This game still holds up great even being released in 2005. The lineup of new characters including ROB and Dry Bones was very rewarding to unlock. Additionally, the kart designs are very unique and quirky. Karts that exemplify these descriptions are Dry Bomber and Rambi Rider. 

The courses in this game are immaculate. Case in point, Waluigi Pinball. This course, in my opinion, holds the title of the best course in the series. Its intricate design followed by unique theming and sound effects set this course apart from the rest in terms of entertainment value. 

Finally, the battle mode in this game gives an additional mode for single-player that adds to the replay value. 

Overall, this game is a very solid title. 

 

  1. Mario Kart Double Dash!!

This installment of the Mario Kart Series took a different approach to the gameplay. Instead of one racer, you guessed it, there are two. This installment is groundbreaking, given that it was the first time Mario Kart had two drivers as opposed to one. 

Multiplayer-wise, this aspect adds a new element to the game and makes co-op multiplayer very frustrating and fun. In co-op, one player is responsible for steering while the other operates items being thrown. 

The courses in the game are very special and compelling. For example, Daisy Cruiser is a course taking place on a cruise ship with riders racing through a dining hall, patio area, and the depths of the ship. Additionally, Baby Park’s small size, definite presence of items, and eight laps give players a crazy racing experience. 

For Nintendo attempting a different approach within the Mario Kart series, I believe it was executed brilliantly.

 

  1. Mario Kart 8 Deluxe

 

This game is wild. If you enjoy tons of DLC content and a wide variety of courses, then this is the game for you. 

The characters in the games are plentiful. For example, there are characters from completely different franchises, such as Link from Legend of Zelda, Inklings from Splatoon, and Isabelle and Villagers from Animal Crossing. There are a total of 41 characters in this game, so choosing a character should not be an issue. 

The course lineup is also very solid. A good choice of classic courses, as well as DLC courses that incorporate different game franchises, is a nice addition. 

This game is excellent. However, the only setback of this game is the lack of shortcuts and glitches within the game. However, the next installment on this list has plenty of those.

 

  1. Mario Kart Wii

This game is the perfect Mario Kart game. No other Mario Kart game can rival it. It’s just that spectacular. This was the first game that introduced motion controls and the only game that has four controller compatibility. Additionally, this game also had online multiplayer which was very fun to play. 

The courses are also fantastic. New courses such as Koopa Cape, DK Summit, and Mushroom Gorge are superb and are top courses in the entire franchise. Although the classic courses are hit-or-miss, there are still some fun ones. Except for Sherbet Land. It sucks. 

The characters in the game are great. Case in point, Funky Kong. This individual exemplifies swagger and grace. Funky Kong is the best character in the series and no one can rival him. Similarly, other characters such as King Boo and Dry Bowser are nice additions. These characters are new to the series and are interesting to play as. 

Finally, the ability to take unique shortcuts and break the game is hilarious. For example, there are current world records on courses such as Grumble Volcano that follow in the high 15 seconds. That amount of exploits in this game are too many to count. 

The game cannot be beaten. It is an embodiment of perfection and nostalgia. It is what upcoming games strive to be.